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[hierophany]

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[freshprints]

But I suppose I can't prevent you.

[hierophany]

Useless criticism, then.

You did a terrible job. Please don't try again.

[freshprints]

They're homemade.

[hierophany]

Yes, that much was more than obvious.

You washed the mold immediately before making them, didn't you? That seems a more likely mistake than forgetting to temper the chocolate.

[freshprints]

...

What about the chocolates caused you to arrive at that conclusion?

[In other words, yes.]

[hierophany]

The texture was grainy. That happens when the fats in the chocolate aren't properly distributed. That's usually caused by failing to temper the chocolate properly, but it can also be caused by the chocolate being exposed to small of water while it's still melted.

I suspect it was the latter, because I don't think that you would fail at a stage that required meticulously following instructions. I think it's more likely that this was your first time making chocolates, and so you needed to buy a new mold. The instructions on the mold would have suggested that you wash it before use. The instructions for making chocolate would have neglected to mention not to wash the mold immediately before use because it would have assumed the background knowledge that molds can be difficult to dry quickly and water reacts badly with melted chocolate.

In much the same way that the instructions for faster than average oatmeal assume a certain amount of background knowledge of microwaves.

[freshprints]

Ah. So that's it. Conflicting instructions led to a poor result.

I'd say that this has been informative — but really it's a pointless explanation since, as directed, I won't be trying again.

[hierophany]

[ ... ]

Are you angry?

[freshprints]

Why would you assume something like that?

[hierophany]

You pointed put that you would be doing as instructed.

That seems unlike you.

[freshprints]

Badgering me about my capacity for direction-following or lack thereof will eventually become unproductive, you realize.

Dispose of the chocolates and be done with it. If you're asked if your girlfriend gave you any, now you can answer truthfully. No one ever asks if you ate them, only if you received them. So it's fine.

[hierophany]

You've yet to answer the question.

Which would lead me to assume that the answer is 'yes'.

[freshprints]

So if I'd met you at the park, you'd have said all this to my face?

[hierophany]

No, probably not at the park.

As you said, you're the only one able to view this conversation.

[freshprints]

But you would have thought it.

[hierophany]

Yeah. I would have.

The top halves of them are passable, where they didn't touch the bottom of the mold. I'd have suggested we split one and then given you the shitty half.

[freshprints]

[.....................]

Yes, I'm angry.

[hierophany]

Because I said they were bad? Or because I suggested you not try again.

If the latter, I apologise. Regular practice is the only way to improve. I shouldn’t discourage anyone from it.

[freshprints]

It's not important. I impulsively attributed a motivation to your behavior that you probably didn't have.

Were you intentionally trying to hurt my feelings, or did you assume I don't have any?

This isn't a trick question. I'm curious.

[hierophany]

The former. Mostly motivated by curiosity.

The performance is there for a reason. Most people don’t like the person I am when it ends. I wanted to know if a complete lack of pretence really was what you wanted.

[freshprints]

Hm. I suppose that's better than the alternative.

Besides, I think you're overplaying your hand. Intentionally trying to hurt my feelings was a performance, too.

[hierophany]

A little. Perhaps I wanted to deter you from pointing out the performance. Which has clearly backfired.

[freshprints]

I doubt it. I know what you look like when something has backfired on you.

It's not this.

[hierophany]

I'll spare us both the part where I pretend not to know what you're talking about.

Things can backfire to different degrees.

[freshprints]

Like your attempt at convincing me that your previous actions had backfired?

I'd say that attempt backfired.